Wednesday, January 27, 2010


I found that awesomeness on my best friend's Spacemummy Flickr page. Dude's been holding back on me. Sure, I've not checked his flickr page in like 2 years. But, knowing my obsession with all things chimptastic he should have sent out a special alert. Pasting that picture onto a card and putting it in my Deck of Random. Which I draw from and inflict on players whenever I'm bored or don't know what to do.

I always want to use flying monkeys [yep I know it's a chimp and chimps aren't monkeys] but they seem a bit too Over the Rainbow, ya know? But, this concept is perfect. Just the essential elements of flying and monkey. Still, they could make use of a prehensile tail. Wrapped around victim's neck for leverage in shattering their skull and eating their tasty non-monkey brains.

I'm not much of a statter upper, or rather I prefer to stat things up on the fly. What can stats tell you that that picture don't? It'll have whatever HD, AC etc are needed at the moment, it flies, it howls, it bites and it can be distracted by bananas. What else is there? How would you stat it up?


  1. Here's my attempt!

  2. WARNING!!! NSFL (not safe for lunchtime)

    Variant of the Howlerbat, I present the Bowelbat (sometimes called the Dire-rhea Bat)

    Size/Type: Small Outsider (Chaotic, Extraplanar, Disgusting)
    Hit Dice: 2d8+22 (31 hp)
    Initiative: +2
    Speed: 10 ft. (2 squares), fly 40 ft. (good)
    Armor Class: 19 (+1 size, +2 Dex, +6 natural), touch 13, flat-footed 17
    Base Attack/Grapple: +2/NA (Bowelbats never grapple)
    Attack: Bite +6 melee (1d2+3)
    Full Attack: Bite +6 melee (1d2+3)
    Space/Reach: 2½ ft./0 ft.
    Special Attacks: Demonic Digestion & Defecation
    Special Qualities: Damage reduction 5/cold iron or good, darkvision 60 ft., immunity to acid and poison, resistance to electricity 10, cold 10, and fire 10, telepathy 100 ft. Double vulnerability to holy water.
    Saves: Fort +16, Ref +5, Will +5
    Abilities: Str 17, Dex 14, Con 32, Int 2, Wis 14, Cha You're kidding, right?
    Skills: Hide +10, Listen +10, Move Silently -10, Spot +8
    Feats: Weapon Focus (bite), Great Fortitude (B)
    Environment: A chaotic, unsanitary plane
    Organization: Colony (10-40) or crowd (10-50)
    Challenge Rating: 2
    Treasure: None that you want
    Alignment: Always Chaotic Nasty
    Advancement: 3-6 HD (Medium)
    Level Adjustment: -

    Demonic Digestion and Defecation (Su)
    Having no room for any gastro-intestinal tract, the Bowelbat extracts nutrients from ingested material instantaneously through supernatural means, then immediately expels the waste matter out through the sphincter located at the back of its skull. This expulsion fills a 2’ cube directly behind the Howlerbat with a heavy mist of caustic, liquid excrement, and that square becomes difficult terrain. All creatures in the square behind a Howlerbat, or otherwise judged to be within the area of effect must succeed on a DC 10 Reflex Save or take 1d4 acid damage due to contact with the liquid. Creatures hit three or more times by DDD must then make a DC 12 Fortitude Save or become sickened for 1d4 rounds. Each time thereafter that a creature is hit by DDD, it must make a Fortitude Save with the DC incremented cumulatively by one. For example, after 4 hits, the DC would be 13. After 5 hits, the DC would be 14. Creatures who become sickened and are subsequently struck again by DDD, must make a DC 12 Fortitude Save or become nauseated for 1d4 rounds. Sickened creatures that do make their save, but are struck again, must make incrementing Fortitude saves following the pattern above.

    Bowelbats themselves are immune to the effects of DDD.


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